September 11, 2007

Fever Dreams

After an EXCITING!!!! day of shuddering under my covers and venturing out once to pick up dinner, I realized something awesome late yesterday night: even when you’re sick, sleeping in means you don’t get to fall asleep quite when you’re supposed to that night. Whacked out on benadryl and slumped at my desk well past 1 AM (prime writing time, by the way), I suddenly sat bolt upright, electrified back into coherence by a burning question of utmost importance:

What the hell happened to Dunkaroos?

Yes, yes, I know. Processed foods are evil. The transfat-laden crap that corporate America would be plunging straight down children’s throats if we’d let ‘em is a scourge, replacing grandma’s real cookies with Grandma’s Cookies and dooming a generation to an uphill battle against obesity. But as you know, some foods are our secret shames, and Dunkaroos were one of mine.

Even as a kid, gleefully tearing through pack after pack, I knew something was Not Right about the sugary, sprinkle-laden frosting that gave the cookies their name. By my third cookie I usually felt pretty queasy, but hell, I didn’t care–petty things like feelings were for after I’d scraped every bit of frosting out of the plastic. And to be honest, I still don’t care. As I munch on organic grapes and sip Coke Zero, I find myself wishing I could indulge in those dippable cookies once more. Come on, man, don’t you tell me that cheerful, jingle-spouting kangaroo (with Aussie accent, natch) didn’t make you want those cookies. Just remembering the commercial makes my stomach growl.

Alas, not even Amazon or eBay can provide me with the cinnamon-flavored blocks of transfat and the vaguely-frosting-like stuff I desire. I guess I’ll have to…

*dramatic eyebrow-raise*

…make some myself. I’ve already got a frosting recipe; now all I need to do is approximate the cookies.

Updates on this mad science project will come whenever I feel crazy enough to spend time baking just to imitate a long-dead prepackaged snack.

-Jim is getting right on this fitness thing, really he is

June 11, 2007


You gotta love the Internet.

It has horrified me, entertained me, and sometimes…inspired me.

This is one of those times. After watching a particularly good episode of my favorite (now ended) video blog The Show With ZeFrank, I knew my life would never be satisfying until I followed the instructions he gave me (watch til the end):

“Put a little oil in the pan, but make sure you add some butter. That’s where the flavor is. Coat it, and then pour yourself a nice, big pancake. Now watch it. See those tiny little holes? Those are bonding holes, and they have a purpose. As soon as you see enough bonding holes, pick the pancake up and crack an egg under it…”

This mad scientist creation is called a Pankegg, and it is delicious. Over the weekend, my ladyfriend and I spent some time in the kitchen, putting Ze’s recipe into action. Here are the results:

Cooking the Pankeggs was harder than I thought it’d be, mainly because juggling a half-cooked pancake on a spatula while you crack open an egg is no easy task. Attaining the “oozy, oozy middle” referred to by Ze also took some trial-and-error; twice I cooked the egg too much and was left with a yummy–but dry–Frankenstein’s monster. The third time, however…


The mix of flavors and textures works really well. The cooked egg white combines with the pancake to make something exquisitely fluffy, and the runny yolk fills the role normally occupied by syrup.

While experimenting, I (at my ladyfriend’s behest) also made an “egg in the basket,” an egg-and-toast combination:

It may look like–and probably is–something served at some roadside greasy spoon, but again, the results make for one hell of a breakfast treat.

How do I top this? Maybe I’ll combine sausage and pancakes! Naw, that’d just be crazy.

EDIT: There’s been a request for egg-in-the-basket instructions as well, and since it is a valid alternative to the Pankegg, here they are: take a piece of bread. Butter it. Cut a circle into the center of the bread; eat the circular scrap that results. Put the bread buttered-side-down in a skillet, crack an egg into the hole, and break the yolk. Allow one side to cook, flip the bread, and lightly cook the other (to insure the whole egg white has been cooked). Enjoy with Pankeggs, Sausage-and-Pancakes-onna-Stick, and…God, I don’t know, Raisin Bran with OJ instead of milk for a complete Mad Scientist breakfast.

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