The Most Ridiculous Cookie Bars Ever

I love fattening foods. There, I said it. As much as I force myself to exercise, drink green tea, and try to be healthy, I can’t escape my attraction to butter, fat, and calorie-laden foods. One of my favorite fat foods is the humble cookie bar. You might call them blondies, but I call them heaven. Keep reading for one of the most outrageous, ridiculous, and absurd recipes for this fattening dessert that I could find. Trust me, you’ll probably need a wheelbarrow to move around after eating these.

The Most Ridiculous Cookie Bars Ever
Yield: 3 dozen
Prep Time: 10 minutes

Cook Time: 25 minutes 

1 stick of butter (try to use a sweet cream butter like Plugra)
1 1/2 C. graham crackers, crushed
1 14-oz. can sweetened and condensed milk
1 C. chocolate chips
1/2 C. butterscotch chips
1/2 C. peanut butter chips
1 C. coconut flakes
1 C. almonds, toasted and chopped
caramel sauce, for drizzling
chocolate sauce, for drizzling

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Melt the butter and place it into a 13 X 9 inch baking pan. Add the graham cracker crumbs and use a form to combine. Press the sandy mixture into the bottom of the dish. Allow to sit for five to ten minutes or until the crust hardens slightly.

After the bottom has hardened, pour the sweetened and condensed milk on top of the crust. Add the chocolate, peanut butter, and butterscotch chips, and then top with coconut.

Bake the mixture for 25 minutes or until golden brown and firmed. Cool completely on a wire rack and then drizzle with the warm caramel sauce and chocolate sauce. If desired, sprinkle with any remaining coconut flakes. Using a very sharp knife, cut the finished product into approximately 36 bars.

If you’re feeling particularly fat, put a scoop of French vanilla ice cream in between two of the bars. I take no responsibility for what happens to your cardiovascular health afterward, though.

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